When you first spot the woman of your dream sitting at the bar or across the restaurant – or across the crowed room, to coin a phrase – your first instinct may be to stroll over and use a little smooth talk to win her over. But before you do this, you should think very carefully about what you are going to say. There are many pick up lines that have been done to death, and no woman in her right mind would succumb to them. Other chat up lines can come across as downright offensive to some women and you are more likely to get a slap across the face than the woman’s phone number.

Cliched pick up lines are totally out of fashion these days, and women are more likely to laugh in your face than swoon at your feet if you approach them with a corny line.  The best way to get a woman to notice you is to go over and chat to her casually – even, ‘hi, how are you?’ can start the conversation off. Choose words that express your interest in finding out more about her rather than trying to get her in to bed.

When you go over to chat up your dream woman, just be yourself. Don’t try and be over-confident as you may come across as arrogant. And don’t just stand around shyly and keep looking at her – she’ll simply think you’re strange. Just talk to her normally, maintain eye contact and smile. And if you are prone to get nervous and stumble over your own words, keep the opening line short and sweet. If she is interested, she’ll respond to your first words. Which will give you time to compose yourself and talk back to her.

And you should never under-estimate the effectiveness of body language to accompany your chat. Don’t look down or around the room as you talk, and don’t cross your arms or fidget. Look her straight in the eye, smile and let your body relax. If you think you might fidget with nerves, take a drink over with you so that you can keep your hands occupied as you ‘clinch the deal’. 

Always remember that your first words and the first impression that you give is what will be the deciding factor in whether she is interested or not. Think of it as a sales pitch to interest a potential client – if you say the wrong thing or give the wrong impression, you’ve lost the client. But if you are confident and down to earth, you do stand a chance with that dream girl.

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